new skin.

heh. im bored. hence the new blogskin.

the pic is taken by my chinese teacher. [he's teaching one of the modules for my part-time chinese course.] he's really proud of it. kept showing us during lesson. he's so keen on sharing his masterpiece that i decided to use it as my blogskin. his enthusiasm is rather contagious. haha. imagine a 60 yr old grandpa showing off his beloved picture. its kinda funny.

some ppl r just plain rude and stuck up. i cant stand it. cant u call back later, bitch.

-breathes-

right. i shld read my accommodation contract, pick up my passport photos and do my cl assi. hur, my second sis went off for a blue sky holiday on some island.
i want to go too.

slackarian.

hur. i've been at home packing my room. cos i'll be going away for quite a substantial period of time. cant leave my mess at home collecting dust right? but all my cupboards/selves/drawers/table are so bursting w things that i cant possibly clear eth at one shot. =/ so i started with my dressing area, then my selves. im planning to start w my table soon. its like overflowing w ALL my stuff. yes, im not the neatest person ard. but my mess is organised mess okay. [ahaha, oxymoron] i know exactly where all my things are, well almost.


during the midst of clearing up old books/files/letters etc is actually quite enjoyable. alot of fond memories came back to me. esp when I was looking thru' letters. its so funny, like taking a ride back in time. when I was 17, 15, 12, 10, 5 wadeva. i really saw how much i've grown, or how childish i was. of cos there are some v unglam pics that i dun really wan ppl to see now [cos of its laughter-inducing factor]. hahah. i was really really fat then. like fat fat. not how girls complain abt their non-existence kind of fat. lol.


these memories will always be part of me. like the friends i've made, the things we did together, for each other will always stay w me. cos without em, i am nothing but an empty shell [w fats and long bones only].


ah, i wonder how it would be like if i go thru' my stuff again 10 years later.

blessed

ytd, i went to town w tiff to buy PILLOWS! ahaha. and the auntie selling pillows at taka actually reccommended a 66 bucks pillow. -_-" hur. do i look like i'll spend waste 66 bucks on a pillow? mayb i look like such a pig that she thinks that i'll buy it. lol. anyway, after tiff decided which pillow to buy, we ran into alicia! haa. and we stood there for like half an hr just to chat and decide when to meet up. but we had to leave cos we'r running late and cia has to work.


i spent abt 100 bucks at true colours. =/ shit. i think im getting tiffany-disease - spending too much. hope i get my pay soon. and the products from true colours had better work.


after that, i went to the pre-departure talk organised by British Council at Pan-Pacific Hotel. i was severely late. but the good thing is i've been reading useful websites on appying visa, booking air tickets and accommodation. so i didnt miss out much. anyway, i visited the U of Leeds booth set up by the singapore society at leeds uni. i ended up standing in front of the booth and chatted w the president of the society like we've known each other for a long time. haha. i suspect he's a caucasian-indian mix. tho he's not v good-looking, but i think he's really cute. -grins- muahahah. =X im really looking forward to e other pre-departure seminar by U of Leeds next sat. heeheee.


my dad got me a new phone for my belated bday pwes. hee. its the red motorola v3i. its so pretty! =D initially, i wanted the D&G limited edition v3i. but after much consideration, i decided to get the normal red one instead. cos UK isnt really the safest place on earth. i dun really want my phone stolen/getting mugged cos of a flashy phone. plus, its abt 200 bucks cheaper. like my younger sis said, i can get another decent phone w that amount of money.


oh, and i upgraded its meomory size to 1GB. muahahaha. so that next time when i travel ard europe, i wldn have to start deleting pics/video/music in my phone. heeheeheee. i actually promised my mum that i'll take pics/videos of myself on a daily basis and email em to her when im at leeds. talking abt narcissism. must learn from sean. hahah.


OOOH! my sis and bro-in-law got me a 30GB ipod!! =D its a pre-departure pwes from em. heehee. i feel so loved. hahaha. yay* fwaahhh. now my mp3 wldn be "puked" out by my MacBook.


aah, i feel so pampered and blessed. =D

im so loved.. .. =D

first of all i just wanna say

THANK YOU!!

to my dear friends who came [mayb i shld say sneaked?] to my house ytd for my bday surprise. hee. thank you for making me feel loved. =D
sorry i let u guys waited for such a longlong time. i really had absolutely NO idea tt u guys r coming. heee.
anyway, thanks again. love u all. -hugs-


ah, gtg. i have to work. =/ ugh.

toiletries

toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries toiletries


just to make sure tt i remember the spelling of TOILETRIES so that somebody cant laugh at me again. well, at least when it comes to the spelling of TOILETRIES.
by the way, the 100 bucks on toiletries is FOR HALF A YEAR'S SUPPLY. cos my aunt told my mum who in turn told me that i shld stock up b4 i go Leeds. cos its cheaper here. and im actually trying to save money okay.

but i had to lug eth[6/7kg] home myself cos my mum's not free to fetch me home. i got like red marks all over my arm cos of my shampoo and stuff. i was so hoping tt on one will see me struggling. den, i ran into one of my mum's ex-student. he was nice enough to help me carry half my load on tt loooong looong stretch of road. i think he is quite cute. and he is studying in AJ yr 2. my dear AJ juniors. do look out for him. =X

but he just had to tell me tt he saw me struggling from far. how unglam.



i could tell from the minute i woke tt its gonna be a lonely lonely lonely lonely daaayy.

dilemma

every ship needs a lighthouse once in awhile. even if its a mirage.
but u ask yourself, 'why would u rather be deceived?'

sigh.

hong kong trip

ah, its been a really long time since i blogged. so for those who haven got the news that im going away in sept to Leeds. yup, i'll be leaving in early sept to study biomedical science at University of Leeds.
i guess this isnt too surprising. cos i didnt exactly do well. and the course that i wanna do (biomed) is quite popular in singapore.
actually, im quite excited abt going Leeds. but apprehensive at the same time. cos u can read all abt leeds. but the actual experience is different for everyone. i can only prepare as much as possible and wait for sept.

the hong kong/guangzhou trip was really good! haha. i spent 5 days in hk w my mum and younger sis. then, 2 days in guangzhou w my dad. anyway, this trip is like a mega shopping trip. heh. i spent almost all my money at Lion Rock Road, Kowloon. its one whole street that sells clothes. really cheap clothes. stuff from A&F, country road, next, hollister, gap, american eagle, DKNY etc etc. they'r like ALL on a 50-90% discount!!! muahaha. plus, THEY ARE NOT COUNTERFEITS!!! they are goods that failed the quality check by the various brands. so, that place is like a F.O.S times 100000 or sth (and of cos, its cheaper). so for those who want to visit HK, pls take some time off for that place. its really worth visit.

but before u get too excited. they dun have a wide range of sizes. and most of the time they only have a few pieces for one design. and another thing that the service wouldn be as good as shopping center boutiques. also, chances are, u will have to really dig for the clothes. haha. its quite a different shopping experience altogether. i dunno if u'll like it. but i definitely love the feeling of getting good buys. =D

alrighty, here's some pics i took during the trip. enjoy.


on the plane.


handle on train.


my little sis. how unglam. haha. but the food's really tasty. :)


this is the tea house menu. it says tt some dumpling costs HK$22.


train to hongkong disneyland. really cute handles.


little sis, mum, me, dad. on train the disneyland.


train to disneyland. nice windows.


disneyland map and entrance tix


me, sis. entrance of disneyland.


miniature house. its very very cute.


the ice cream cart.


shit. forgot e name.


sis, me. (yes, i know that i grew fat. dun remaind me. hur.)


heh. my manicured fingers. it costs me only 20 rmb. v pretty right?


stuff that i bought during the trip. its uploaded upon the request of yvonne. haha. doubt that u can see eth tho.

hmmm, this is one LONG entry (comparatively). oh. before i go off, just wanna say: I GOT A MACBOOK!!! hee. its like a dream come true.
ha ha ha. cheerios.

MacBook

hee. a MacBook asks nicely. =D
ahahaa.
yes, im getting this. soon.


its beautiful.

invigilation

i've been doing invigilation for the past week. i think this is highly suitable for ppl who like to pace and space. all u need to do is to walk and forth the rows, stare at the kids and get lost in your own thoughts till its time to collect their papers. its so darn boring.


well, actually i do like the spacing part. its how i function as a person. i dun understand those who needs zero personal space. like as if u'll cease to exist if ur on ur own [physically and metally] for just a tiny minute. for me its like the opposite. i need those times to feel alive sometimes. and yes, i do need to interaction w ppl and have company; im not an autist. but not an overdose of it. it makes me breathless. and if u think tt im weird. im not. its just who i am and what i do.


We should all learn how to move on; you'll be surprised at what can happen.

lousy behaviour

i knew she was lying. it was the 0.1 sec of hesitation and that slight quiver in her voice.

got meh? u sure not? ... maybe i was talking to myself.

that was such a bad lie. it was like she's pleading insanity to get away w her actions. [actually come to think abt it, most ppl charged w first degree murders to tt. haha.] ah well, not like its really a v big thing. just that it reflects quite a bit abt her. is it so hard to just admit your mistake and apologise graciously?

maybe if its me, i cant do it too.


sigh. i still haven get any news from ntu or nus yet. looks like i might just spend the next few years overseas.

nice.

then my mother and i are nearly alone in the courtroom. i lean forward to kiss her on the cheek. 'you did really great up there, ' i tell her, because i don't know how to say what i really want to: that the people you love can surprise you everyday. that maybe who we are isn't so much about what we do, but rather what we're capable of when we least expect it.

okay. i spent my whole labour day reading and eating away. its really quite an ideal thing to do. except when your mum ans sis are slogging away, making you feel guilty.
anyway, bit above is from the book that i finished reading today. its my sister's keeper, by jodi picoult. its a beautiful book. the emotions and thoughts going through the characters' mind are so vivid that it feels almost like im going through their dilemma. what i say here cant do justice to that book. u gotta read it and feel it for yourself. (=


and i can totally relate to the part where anna wants to be kate's sister all her life.

end of the week

sigh. im tired. both physically and metally. i really need a break. i want to have my own space and time. but when i have nth to do. im gonna complain too. i dun really wanna resort to watching tv to let those fictional stories fill up my life.

it'll only make me feel emptier than ever.


hur. maybe its just the raging hormones that's making me all sulky and stuff. maybe.


im such a mummy's girl.

july.

JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.



haha. some are so untrue.
but some r pretty accurate.
do list out the untrue ones on my tagboard. it should b pretty interesting. hahaha.

sheesh.

i've been getting quite a bit of mails from uk these days. heh heh. cos all the unis that i've applied in march thru UCAS [univerisity and college admission service] are offering me a place in their unis. so now i have 4 choices. [oh no. 5 including University of Western Australia.] they are namely University of Leeds, Bristol, Aberdeen and Liverpool John Moore University. i am like reciveing mails 3 or 4 times per week. i got newsletters from the school, accomodation guide, course prospectus and of cos, the official offer letter from UCAS. so i guess if NTU or NUS dunwan me, i'll be going off in sept to uk.

it was actually pretty exciting when i was applying for the unis. like going away to other places. and a chance to experience a whole new life, meet different ppl. learn to be independent etc etc.

hur. but when it really seems like i really gotta go. im worried. can i adapt to the new environment? wad if i cant? and wad abt my friends and family? [i'd really miss em.] if i really go there to study, it'll be a good 3 or 4 years. tt'l b quite some time. =/ sigh.



anyway, i'll be going to hong kong on the 20th june. its like a shopping-cum-visit trip.
hope that it'll be fulfilling.

just for laughs

i got quite a funny call just now from someone who 'just wanna chat w me'.

now, here's a rough dissection of the caller;

ulterior motive: to impress [by telling me that he read some self-help books, checked the meaning of a certain word and was trying to share his findings.] and to flatter.

reason [caller stated] for calling: just wanna chat. to know me better. he said that after observing me, he found that my personality dun fit the "elite sports person" personality profile. tried to get me to explain that. hello. im not even in the national youth team. could have been and the actual thing are different. and who said that im 'quiet and one who keeps alot to herself'? its just a signal from me to him. like, big and flashing "clear off".
after that, he asked if i chat w ppl on msn. sigh. who doesnt? its just a matter of who is the person in question. so i ended up telling him that i dun like to talk alot, esp to random ppl. well, i almost added 'like u' to tt sentence. but i figured tt its not so nice.

eloquence: =/

characteristics: likes to show off. thick, very. weird.

sigh. so the conclusion is that he tried too hard, and failed miserably in his mission. hur. now i must more find ways to avoid him in school. or try to get him enlightened, somehow.

its hard to be nice.

hopes and fears.

i had a weird dream ytd. the possibility of it happening in reality is less den zero. but i rmb being really contented in that dream. as if i was happy, all over again.

yet, as reality kicks in and when i rationalise eth. im back to square one. together w all my hopes and fears.

deesire

life

yay*

i finished 2 weeks worth of lesson plan. acids and bases.
anyone wants a recap on O'level chem??
lol.
i think im having an overdose of csi. been watching it every night before i sleep. kept having dreams abt being involved in csi. and i dun usually rmb my dreams. oh well, mayb one fine day i'll b wearing one of those "FORENSICS" vast tt Grissom wears while i work.
hahaha.. its a fatter den me hope.
like wad my mum said, singapore is too safe. we dun need so many CSIs ard.

wadeva. its nice daydreaming once in awhile.

skinny

okay. new skin. HEE. ripped the pic off www.deviantart.com

be still my heart

Be Still My Heart - The Postal Service

I was running late for work
So I didn't change my shirt
The evening's drinks left a lingering taste in my mouth
And when I left
You were fast asleep
Tangled in the sheets
And on the bus I could have sworn it was all a dream
And it didn't happen to me

And then I felt the scrapes
From the slippery subway grate.
Oh how you laughed
At my complete lack of grace.
But I could not recall
A more perfect fall
Cause when I looked up into your eyes
It didn't hurt at all.

And I thought, be still my heart
This could be a brand new start, with you.
And it will be clear
If I wake up and you're still here with me in the morning.

And I thought, be still my heart
This could be a brand new start, with you.
And it will be clear
If I wake up and you're still here with me in the morning.

wad i hear these days

hah? why like that? haiyo.

ooh. den wad are u planning to do?

well, u can try applying.

oh. okay.

results are not eth, its really abt e person u are.

er, are u bluffing me?

not bad. are u like celebrating somewhere?

sigh. below expectation leh.

its like u'r not up there nor down there.


sigh. i hate results to nowhere. totally.

the girl in the other room

the girl in the other room - diana krall



The girl in the other room
She knows by now
There's something in all of her fears
Now she wears it threadbare
She sits on the floor
The glass pressed tight to the wall
She hears murmurs low
The paper is peeling
Her eyes staring straight at the ceiling

Maybe they're there
Maybe it's nothing at all
As she draws lipstick smears on the wall

The girl in the other room
She powders her face
And stares hard
Into her reflection

The girl in the other room
She stifles a yawn
Adjusting the strap of her gown
She tosses her tresses
Her lover undresses
Turning the last lamp light down
What's that voice we're hearing?
We should be sleeping
Could that be someone who's weeping?

Maybe she's there
Maybe there's nothing to see
It's just a trace of what used to be

The girl in the other room
She darkens her lash
And blushes
She seems to look familiar

outside looking in

sigh. results wil b out on wed. wonder how it'l b like. =/

starting work tmr. hope it goes on well. i'm suppose to go thru their common test ppr marking scheme w em. ah well.

im like in e outside looking in mode. hurr.

im a lazy pig..

oh bother! i'm absolutely bored
and yet enjoying this newfound boredom. haha. this sounds totally contradicting. well, i guess it happens when u'r jobless, bf-less and sch-less. its like u get to wake up every morning doing wadeva u fancy. this is not e best part tho. e best part is to indulge in e laziness wo feeling guilty or part of u dreading e consequences. muahaha.

but of cos there'r always 2 sides to eth. stimes i get paranoid abt not having to do ath and worry abt not worrying abt ath. hur. this is so absolutely weird. sigh. mayb i'm just not use to being lazy.
stimes when i get too bored, i'll start imaging all e tiny neurons firing signals in my head telling me tt im so bored tt im doing all tt im doing. haa. tt sounds funny.

ah, mr thomas just told me tt e teacher i'm relieving wants to see me regarding her lessons. great! i have sth to do now..

ugh. overnight coke sucks.

just for fun

http://kevan.org/johari?name=gniygniy

just curious abt wad ppl think of me. haha.

take it back

Take It Back – Loquat

I know all you u wouldn’t see
But these neuroses go pretty deep
And the words we use
I have the nicest ones

I know what a jerk I am
And what a pain in the ass you are

I don’t want to drive u up a cliff
So before we get to that
I gotta say sorry I take it back
I’m sure u don’t wanna burn me apart and down
So before we get to that
Could you please just take it back

It looks as though you are cursed
As for being difficult turned to worse
But at times you’ll find
I’ll make it easy on you

I know what a jerk I am
And what a pain in the ass you are

I don’t want to drive u up a cliff so before
So before we get to that I gotta say sorry I take it back
I’m sure u don’t wanna burn me apart and down so before
We get to that could u please just take it back

Listen I heard what you said
You don’t have to repeat it
I'd rather that conversation got totally deleted

I don’t want to drive u up a cliff
So before we get to that I gotta say sorry I take it back
I’m sure you don’t wanna burn me apart and down so before
We get to that could you
Please just take it back

hur. finally manage to figure out e lyrics for this song. tho i bet its loaded w errors. but oh well, since i cant find this lyrics anywhere i gotta make do w this. haa. mayb i shld get their CD online or sth. heeheeeee..

my mood

sunny/overcast

club

i forgot e flash. haha. but e lights at e side r pretty nice.


jas, tiff, me.


james, james' friend [didnt quite get his name =X]


james, in lala land

went to this party at chinablack ytd. it was my first time clubbing w my friends and hitting e dance floor. haha. it was quite fun. but e LOUD music and e smoke can b rather irritating. we had to shout into each other's ears like we'r all deaf.

anyhow, we watched walk e line after we left e club. nice show. but james fell asleep about half an hr into e movie and only woke up after we took e picture. hahah. by then it was 5 am alr. i've nv been in town so early. lol.

its great to have friends who understand u, knowing things that u just cant quite put in words. but know it anyway. =)

e bottom right-hand corner says, "~cryptic~".

took this at an obscure corner at raffles place mrt after work few days back. haha. i must say that this vandalism is pretty well done. cos its at a corner where e watchful surveillance camera cant reach and that piece of ppr is like stuck to e wall - no way of tearing it out. mayb except e corners. haha.

OH! for those who dunno yet. i'm gonna change my job!! got a felief teaching post at phs. haha. im teaching chem. full time. =D yay* no more aunties, ironing, standing for 9 hrs str.

but i think i'l miss doris tho. she's really nice.

okay. gtg. im going to malaysia. again. woohooooo. hahaha.. and i think i'l wear heels tonight. an excuse not to dance. =X

cny

oh well my photo-taking skills sucks. hands shake too much. hur. anyhow, tts how i spent my 1st day of cny night. =D quite fun. and i didnt have to foot e bill. lol*

angst?

"For What Reason"
- death cab for cutie

This won't be the last you'll hear from me...
it's just the start.
I hope that he keeps you up for weeks like you did to me.

I will hold a candle up to you to singe your skin.
brace yourself...
i'm bent with bitterness i cant forsake

When your apologies fail to ring true,
(you're) so slick with that sarcastic slew or phrases like 'i thought you knew',
while keeping me in hot pursuit.

Tracing the plot finds
skin touching skin (abscence follows).
In the end, i win every time as ink remains.
Sour tastes prevail as you play back the tape machine.

....

weird ppl.

i've been working for 14 days. really new and different experience altogether compared to sch. [like DUH]

anyway, i've met customers who

: just wanna see wad other ppl is looking at.
: taught me how to cure pimples [didnt really work tho]
: like to ask e same qn ["nice or not?" *3165428498578219 times or "really got nomore stock alr ar?" at 2pm and at 7pm]
: try for e sake of trying and just leave wo a word and dump e clothes somewhere
: come into e shop to kill time and tell u str to ur face. [like we have to kill for her]
: are really sweet and polite and understanding
: finds non-existence defects in a 10 bucks cardigan and demands for a 50% off for tt piece
: just want u to dig out e new piece for her during peak hour and later say tt she stil prefer e old one cos she dun HAVE TO IRON WHEN SHE GETS HOME!!!
: has colour theme each week for her dressing
: comes down every lunch to take up space and tell everyone theres 20% off when she fancies
: chatted w me for half an fr like we'r old, long-lost friends and den asked for my no.
: think tt im darn tall
: thought tt im 57 kg. [HAHAHAHAHAHAHA]
: only buy stuff under 10 bucks
: bought a long obiang skirt frm us and went ard asking other customers if her skirt is nice.
: are just so charismatic tt u just wanna do ur best to help her.
: won a 10,000 bucks voucher at a shop at parkmall.
: comes to e shop almost everyday to see if theres stock for her fav skirt tt doesn have her size.
: open their eyes in shock when they found out tt work shirts/bags r actually 15 bucks only.

ah well. and e list goes on. they can b quite funny at times. lol. and totally weird.
hmm. mayb work dun suck so much. my boss and colleague r nice ppl. who like to bitch. =X

randomm comments.

i read 1 1/2 books today. finish 1/2 of malka and e undomestic goddess. e latter is quite a bimbotic book. but well. i read it for e happily ever after ending. haa. hur.
and to imagine a special someone telling me that he "preferred not to be six hrs' drive away" frm me and gave up his dream for it. haha. i think im in fantasyland.

sigh. i guess i shld get a grip.

but speaking of a special someone. i think tt everyone needs someone. to rely on and just having someone. not just in e form of bf/gf/husband/wife tt sort. but friend[s] too. but well. it aint tt easy. stimes. things just dun go e way u want it to or anticipant it to be. and often, tho its all unspoken and avoided, u just feel e tension and it spoils ur day - totally.

hurr. i love and hate rainy weathers.

turn me on

Norah Jones
"Turn Me On"


Like a flower
Waiting to bloom
Like a lightbulb
In a dark room
I'm just sittin here waiting for you
To come on home and turn me on

Like the desert waiting for the rain
Like a school kid waiting for the spring
I'm just sitting here waiting for you
To come on home and turn me on

My poor heart
Its been so dark
Since you've been gone
After all your the one who turns me off
You're the only one who can turn me back on

My hot fires waiting for a new?
My glass is waiting for some fresh ice cubes
I'm just sitting here waiting for you
To come on home and turn me on
Turn me on

quando quando quando

Quando, Quando, Quando when when when

by Michael Buble
*featuring Nelly Furtado

Tell me when will you be mine
Tell me quando quando quando
We can share a love devine
Please don't make me wait again

When will you say yes to me
Tell me quando quando quando
You mean happiness to me
Oh my lover tell me when

Every moments a day
Every day seems a lifetime
Let me show you the way
To a joy beyond compare

I can't wait a moment more
Tell me quando quando quando
Say its me that you adore
And then darling tell me when

Every moments a day
Every day seems a lifetime
Let me show you the way
To a joy beyond compare

I can't wait a moment more
Tell me quando quando quando
Say its me that you adore
And then darling tell me when

Whoa lover tell me when
Oh darling tell me when
Oh come on tell me when
Yea tell me when

dunno why. but i feel romantic today. guess its e rainy weather and this song just popped out on my playlist. it feels almost perfect, except i have no one to b romantic to. well mayb only myself or my pillow. ah well.

hurr. hope cny wil come soon. not for e ang bao. cos i really wanna quit my current job at e end of jan. kiasu aunties r e worst specise on planet earth.

'er, do u have a new piece for this top.'

'yup, there is'

fumble fumble fumble

'u want to check e new piece?'

'okay.'

scrutinise scrutinise scrutinise

'well, i think i want e old one.'

@#%^?*&

hasty entry, not Tasty

oh well. this is gonna b short. i gotta go off to prepare for work alr.

ytd, this customer of mine kindly told me how to treat my pimply forehead. this is how it goes.

1. peel some orange skins. [well, if u like oranges just might as well eat e pericarp]
2. soak e orange skins into water
3. leave it overnight in e fridge
4. apply e water on affected area and leave it to dry
5. repeat 2/3 times a day
6. wait and see e results.

well, to those who think they need some pimple treatment, just try this la. its cheap and perhaps it really helps. cos e most nutritious part of a fruit is usually e fruit wall. and orange skin may contain some acids to kill pimples. lol*

and she told me to spread it ard. so ya. here it is. :]

shit, gotta go. bye.

work, 1st time. hurr.

okay. today's my first day at work. it was quite okay. my colleage is qite nice. v patient w me and not laughing at me too much when i made a mistake. haha~ oh well. and after standing for 9 hrs. my legs and back are aching. hurrr. tmr wil be e same i guess. but i hope tt i'l b less gong when customers ask abt e price/size/things tt u ask when ur buying clothes.

hur. tired. hope i can make a couple of earrings b4 i sleep. need to replenish my stock at e minimart downstairs. [im putting my earrings there for e auntie to sell. and she's nice enough to help :)]

okay. im off to a nice shower to relax. hurrrrrrr.

my li'l sis ordered me to put this down: my first day of sch im v inspired to work v hard. vaaa[very] hard.

NYE

okay. today is e last day of e yr 2005. and this is my list of new yr's resolution.

1. earn and save money [50bucks a month?] to spend? lol.
2. be more confident of myself?
3. learn driving. mobilitymobilitymobility
4. lose some weight
5. jog at least twice a week [hmmmmm] or do suction lipectomy.
6. blog more regularly
7. speak up [more?]
8. cultivate good habits like brushing my teeth [every morning. oops. night. =D]
9. eat less junk [m&s junkies]; more health food [a.k.a un-tasty food]
10. dream less abt dark tall handsome strangers hitting on me. ="(
11. read more books. not merely re-reading harry potter.
12. b more IT-savvy. [DUN LAUGH. I REPEAT DO NOT LAUGH]
13. tag more on ppl's blog. [dun b a mere ghost]
14. initiate more activities w friends. [dun keep lazing away at home reading and pigging out]
15. buy contacts and white metal frame specs. nice
16. ask money from dad less
17. well, talk more to my dad
18. b less of a mummy's girl [hope my mum doesnt see this. hurrr]
19. buy less bags and clothes. HEEEE
20. lose weight
21. learn how to cook. in case i have to go abroad to do uni
22. psycho my mum into getting cable tv [i want MTV]
23. save 110 bucks to get v nice and gorgeous diamond alike crystal belt frm arab street. =/
24. make more accessories to sell/give ppl
25. watch love actually w little sis on christmas
26. keep my messy room tidier
27. check up e dictionary more [instead of telling myself i cant know every word]
28. borrow and watch csi season 4 [rizal plsssssssss]
29. play more tennis and improve myself. [so that SOME ppl wil quit laughing at me. hmphf.]
30. eat less chocolate bars. [tasty]
31. read newsppr more. [so tt when some big shot VIP dies i wldn sound like a bimbo when a foreigner asks me abt it]
32. wear more REAL bras. [not just sports bra]
33. be a nicer person. bitch less
34. be less cynical

okay. thats abt all for now. heh. its alr 010106. -gasps- i spent a yr trying to write out my new yr's reso. LOL* oh well.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY! may it b a fruitful yr. =D

and just wanna thank all my friends [old, new, not so old but not too new.] for being there and laughing at/w me. haha~ i wldn b me wo u all. :)

and i say hooowoohoowooo.

im quite bored at home. getting fat and stuff. sigh. =/ i need to find a job soon. i feel parasitic. living off my parents and doing nth too constructive. except converting oxygen to carbon dioxide. hurrr. even plants have more use den me. =// -sobs-

hur better look thru e papers and call up phs.

i was e one worth leaving.

"The District Sleeps Alone Tonight" - Postal Service

Smeared black ink... your palms are sweaty
And I'm barely listening to last demands
I'm staring at the asphalt wondering what's buried underneath
Where I am
Where I am

I'll wear my badge... a vinyl sticker with big block letters adherent to my chest
That tells your new friends I am a visitor here...I am not permanent
And the only thing keeping me dry is
Where I am
Where I am
Where I am

You seem so out of context in this gaudy apartment complex
A stranger with your door key explaining that I am just visiting
And I am finally seeing
Why I was the one worth leaving
Why I was the one worth leaving
D.C. sleeps alone tonight
Where I am
Where I am
Where I am

You seem so so out of context in this gaudy apartment complex
A stranger with your door key explaining that I am just visiting
And I am finally seing
Why I was the one worth leaving
Why I was the one worth leaving
Where I am
Where I am
Where I am

The district sleeps alone tonight after the bars turn out their lights
And send the autos swerving into the loneliest evening
And I am finally seeing
Why I was the one worth leaving
Why I was the one worth leaving
Why I was the one worth leaving
Why I was the one worth leaving

okay. im blogging, again. im leaving for KL tonight w jas rizal and eddie. :) hope it'l b a gd trip. haha. its so exciting!! 1st time traveling wo my mum or sch teachers. hahahaha.

abercrombie and fitch HERE I COME!!!!!!

and tif has kindly reminded me bout e great sale. HAHAHA. YAY*!

muahahaha. i think e leaves worked. =D

leaves.

anyway, 8 leaves fell on to me ytd. hahaha. 8 wishes. muahahaha.

hurrrrrrrrrrr

after some considerations, i've decided to lower e price of my earrings to $3.90 or $4.90 depending on the size and design. so cheerios!
oh and im trying to make more earrings to cater to e bimbos. LOL* =X

anyway, its v tiring to be misunderstood all e time. hurrrrr. and there is a limit to eth. even nice-ness.

earrings.. more.

sickk

i'm sick. hurr. i hate it. sore throat plus flu. HURRR. oh well. im trying to upload pics of wad i've made for my flea market stall. but my connection is so darn slow that i have to retry like 2 million times. hurrrr. oh well more will b up. tts all for now i guess.


earrings going at 5 bucks per pair. pls contact me if interested. :)

siiigh

"Sunday Morning" - Maroon 5

Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would lead me back to you
That someday it would lead me back to you

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave

Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave

But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I'm calling out to you
Singing someday it'll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself back home to you
And you may not know

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning

just feeling a lil sulky. i think my alienation mode is kicking in. all i wanna do now is to read a book listen to music and just mind my own business. hurrr.

went for suntanning just now. hope i burnt a few calories off. was sweating like mad. but my back's darker den my front. argh. it always happens. =/

prom

prom was. quite normal. dinner. few laughters due to dumb jokes made by the mc. and he didnt get e fact right for one of e jokes. he said tt rj prom was like "a few weeks back". but well. its actually today. ah well..

anyway, i think i wldn wear my heels anymore. hurr. my feet are still hurting.

okaay. im off to watch andy lau in e return of e condor heros. muahahaha.

nth

do visit wiggly piggly k. :) he's lime green and v cute. click on him 3 times to see it roll-in-the-mud!!!!!

hurrr.. prom prep

okay. i've decided to blog. after a week of silence. oh well. been bz w my flea market stuff and these few days, prom.

its not enjoyable nor easy shopping for clothes wo a nice body [flat stomach is lacking for me] next to a low budget. hurrr. found a decent dress nonetheless. nth spectacular. quite plain and common. well at least its green. not e clone colour - black. but now, i worry abt seeing someone wearing e same dress tonight. sigh* life sucks, truth hurts. oh well.

i guess this is one of e days when my mood is like e weather today. one side of it is nice and bright and sunny - perfect day for suntanning and picnic if u have company. while e other side is gloomy dark and overcast - like a terrible storm is coming up. and poor me. just stuck in e middle like a piece of ham in a sandwich. sigh. hurrr. im so eccentric and to a certain extent pathetic.

time to iron my dress and get ready for prom tonight. seeya.

the greatest thing u'l ever learn is just to love and to be loved in return.
okay, this is quite a cliche quote since moulin rouge is screened yrs ago. but i stil cant help but to cry at e part where e supposed guitarist in a play screamed tt in e show. and ewan McGregor is so darn cute.

weird post

1. hurrr.
2. im feeling bored.
3. flea market isnt an easy thing to plan.
4. hurrrrrr.
5. and ask me why i keep 'hurrr'-ing.
6. i totally have no idea.
7. haha.
8. this post is so completely weird.
9. LOL*
10. ciao!

mad

hee. i think im quite mad. kept coming back to look at my own blogskin. HEEE. =D

well. gtg. watching harry potter in awhile!!

yay*

falling leaf

hmmm. well tif once told me "catch a falling leaf and u can make a wish". so everytime when i walk out from my house to e mrt i'l look out for wandering leaves floating in e air. hoping tt it'l come in my direction for a free wish. but well, u dun always get wad u want. everytime when a leaf approaches me, it'l suddenly turn its direction and go away frm me. =/ hurrr. nonetheless, i stil hope tt e leaf wil fall on me one day or lemme catch it somehow.

then, one day e wish came. i was walking along orchard w james another day. just talking and walking aimlessly. den sth fell from above, right before me and brushed off my hand. but i was too startled by it and thought it was some insect. hurrrrrr. so my free wish was gone just like tt.

ah well, i guess tts how things go stimes. e thing is, i dun even know if my wish wil come true even if i manage to catch one one day. =/

..

hurrrr. my mum bought me a new phone. HEE. yay. now i can take pics like mad. HAHAHAH. but. theres one tiny setback - i cant install my new phone to e com. that means i cant upload ath frm my phone to e com and frm e com to my phone. =/ lets hope its yet. mayb i can get e darn cd frm nokia care or sth. muahahaha.. anyway its a nokia 3230. hee. nth spectacular compared to 3G phones or some bimbotic pink v3. but i like. :)) it has e functions tt i want in a phone. haha. YAY!* but hope i'l get e cd soooon. if not i can only just take pics and del em. =/

i've been sleeping alot alot these days. haa. post exams. i'm allowed to behave like a total pig. -oink- =D hoho. im going shopping later w my mum. woohooo. i think im quite a mummy's girl.

......

after A's

*yawns

im so totally tired today. dun really feel like writing ath.

i dun wan to drive u up above

so before we get to there

i gotta say sorry i take it back

i'm sure u dun wanna burn me apart down

so before we get to that

could u pls just take it back?

listen i heard wad u said

u dun have to repeat it

i'd rather that conversation got totally deleted

hurrrrr

haa. just sth random. heee.

heely

hurr.

last ppr on thurs. bio mcq. ugh.

oh well. im wearing my 4'' heels walking at home. and looking damn ridicules.

LOL* exam stress.

argh! im v irritated by e show tt i've been watching! WHY E BAD GUY MUST WIN!!!! ARGH.

hurr. im waiting for e part to b over den contd watching later.

lol* im being silly.

boredd

hurrr. im at maccafe. im so freaking BORED!!

well. i am suppose to study. and i guess if u dun feel like studying, tts it. u cant concentrate no matter where u are. =/ SIGH.
i hate exams!

wads worse, my whine absorber is not ard to listen. :( not like i whine alot. but i need an outlet. LOL*

ARGH! i absolutely DO NOT feel like studying, tho tts wad i shld do.

how!! somebody saaaavve meeee!

nearing post exam

sheesh. i dun feel like studying.. at all. baaah. that means i'd better not stay home today. if not i'l have a new blogskin again. hahahaa.

anyway, its only 5 days to go. its so near, yet so far. =/

oh well. im totally addicted to loquat's take it back. get it here!
its totally beautiful. haa.

i know wad a jerk i am and wad a pain in e ass u are..

booohooooo

im gonna have an afternoon ppr later. at 2:30pm.

hur. 6 days to go.

>>

hmm. tired. i kinda like united sq starbucks. :)

nice.

arghh.

im... bored.

was trying real hard to study for my chem ppr 2 tmr. well did like 2 pprs alr. too saturated to study anymore or do ath chem-related. bah. its really quite torturous to have like breaks in between pprs. im not e last min kind. i just want eth to b over once and for all. =/ ah well. no point lamenting.

BAAAAHH. im so freaking restless!!!! just like waiting and waiting for sth to come. u know it wil but u just cant help but to dread e wait. -screams-

10 days. yes, ten freaking days.

suundaay

11 days to gooooo!!

since today is a sunday. lemme relax a lil. and project into the future.

After A's... (which is like in 11 days!!!!)

1. Shop. alot.
2. sell stuff at a flea market
3. play!
4. change blogskin
5. play vb, beach vb, tennis
6. get back my long gone tan [i look like some sickly yellow thing now =/]
7. relief teaching
8. watch MOVIES [harry potter!!!]

9. get a man. [ahahaha. kidding la. i think they they'r extinct.]

10. watch my VCDs and DVDs.
11. go lil india and arab street
12. burn notes [haha.]
13. go KL my classmates! yay*
14. pack my damn messy room [b4 e mess drowns me in my sleep.]
15. and give away some of my stuff to e salvation army
16. do silly things that u can do after a major exam. [er. i'l tell u wad im doing when exams ends.]
17. ............
18. ........

hee. this list is not exhaustive. i have like a glorious 6 months ahead of me!!!
lalala~

.

pensive pensive..

this is one of my rare sleepless nights. in a long long while...

put the lime in e coconut

Coconut Harry Nilsson

Brother bought a coconut, he bought it for a dime
His sister had another one, she paid it for the lime
She put the lime in the coconut, she drank 'em both up (3x)
Put the lime in the coconut, she called the doctor, woke him up, and said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache
Now let me get this straight
Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up (3x)
Put the lime in the coconut, you called your doctor, woke him up, and said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache
You put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both together
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better
Put the lime in the coconut, drink 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the morning
Brother bought a coconut, he bought it for a dime
His sister had another one, she paid it for the lime
She put the lime in the coconut, she drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, she called the doctor, woke him up, and said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Now let me get this straight
You put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both up (3x)
Put the lime in the coconut, you're such a silly woman
Put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both together
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better
Put the lime in the coconut, drink 'em both down
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the morning
Woo-oo, ain't there nothin' you can take, I said
Woo-oo, to relieve your bellyache, you said
Woo-oo, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Woo-oo, to relieve your bellyache, you say
Yeah-ah, ain't there nothing I can take, I say
Wow-ow, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said (3x)
Doctor, you're such a silly woman
Put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both together
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better
Put the lime in the coconut, drink 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the mo-o-ornin'
Yes, you call me in the morning
If you call me in the morning I'll tell you what to do {repeat to fade}

14

ugh. trying in vain to study for gp. =/

14 days to go...

dream.

today i woke up feeling happy.

initially couldn rmb why. but as i was walking to e mrt i suddenly rmbed that i was totally in love w this guy who is in love w me too last night. haha. simply loving someone who loves u too.

but it was just a dream that i had last night.
reality sucks. =/



15 to goooooooooo...

/

16

=/

17 days to freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeedoooom!!!

bahh.

.

today, i ran 4km unknowingly. lol.

wanted to lose some weight for prom. so went to e gym to jog on e treadmill this morning. i didnt know that e setting on e machine was in miles. [and 1 mile=1.6km] so basically i ran faster and covered a longer dist. thus, e 2.4mile cos i wanted to run like 2.4km.

but well. extra 226 cal burnt today. yay*

.......

just remembered sth. i use to b v traumatised by this ringtone in my old 7610. it filled me w dread fear and a tiny hint of regret whenever i hear it. esp in e middle of e night.

but now. my phone's gone. and i've learnt to get a grip of myself. oh well.

weird.

haha.one of my mum's funny ideas for e choice of location for e EXIT sign. lol. well she thinks im funnier den her cos i was e one who stole it frm sch [from e bench in e mph]. =D and i smuggled it out w han ytd. lol*

baah

had my chinese ppr ytd. it was.... quite okay la. ohwell. its over alr. can kiss e 4 tb goodbye alr. heh. no i wouldn burn it. hahaha~ hmmm. i think im rather weird. on thurs i was at braddell macs studying my chinese lit. and listening to english songs in my mum's laptop. haha~ its like a mix of 2 entirely different languages and culture. lol. im weird.

baaah. my house is as messy as ever. and dirty. =/ and my living room's fucking small now. im only like barely 2m away from my telly. -shakeshead- sighh. well not like i can make any noise. unless i wanna sleep on e streets or at my dad's apartment. =/

hmmm. its public hol today. dun feel like doing any work. muz enjoy e festive mood. w some candles. lol. FAT hope. ohya. talking abt fat. its like my wt has been increasing exponentially [think y=e^x graph. for non math students pls look at ur right palm and refer to e line that goes upwards]. =(( so im playing tennis w my lil sis and han later. hopefully i wouldn jus lose water.

ha. oh well. luckily fats r not permanent growth like bones. they'r storage tissues which can b broken down to yeild metabolic water. so i stil can lose weight. heh. too bad abt e bones. haaa. im just gonna b this tall. for e rest of my life. muahahaha. im crazy. pls ignore me.

=( okaaay. better do some work. last 50m sprint alr. GOOD LUCK TO ALL THOSE WHO NEED IT LIKE MEEE!! gaaah.

mugging

boohoo. using my mum's laptop. heh. we'l be going to united sq starbucks later w my mum and lil sis. heh. mayb i can blog again when we'r there. HEE` wad a poser. okaay. im hungry hope we eat sth nice later. =D

bored.

i guess im just bored. =/

feeling nostalgic

:( im bored and i dun feel like doing work.

.

bah. its sunday again. well one more week to my chinese ppr. :( i think i'm really gonna screw e ppr up. sigh.

hope han gets well soon. sighh. its terrible to fall sick during this period of time. =/

TENNIS

had my first tennis lesson today. it was rather fun. my sis said that i play like a volleyballer. oh well. its quite easy up pick up i guess. haha. more than 70% of balls went to e front. haa. not v disastrous la.

ugh. my biological alarm is signalling that i shld sleep soon. haha~ did one chem ppr 3 today. and when i asked my tutor for e ans, he said he haven done e qns yet. hahaha. im more hardworking den my teacher loh. lol. hope he doesnt see this. hahaha.

haiyo. my sis is watching some award winning tamil movie which is supposedly 10 hrs long. man. its like a classic indain movie where they dance alot. haa. im soooo envious of her. this is e kind of silly things u can do after exams - watch bollywood movies. =\

BAH!! i wanna sleep alr. tmr i'l b going woodlands lib w tif to study. AND R WE HAVING LUNCH OR NOT I ASKED U AT LEAST LIKE 10TIMES ALR!! FOOD'S V IMPT TO ME! -ROARS-

okaaay. good night. zzzzzz

fat

i feel fat today. sigh. probably cos my abercrombie shorts that use to b damn loose became just nice now. X( sighh. i hate e exams. makes me stress and fat. ugh. i need liberation and exercise.

oh well. studied e whole day today. and was pretty productive. oh well. 2 weeks to my 1st ppr. hardly have any choice but to do work.

i feel tired. *yawns

oh did i mention that i'l b going for a trip to KL after a's w my classmates? yay* haha. i stil have e piece of majong ppr that has rizal's v messy planning for e trip. =) woohoooo.

well. hope i'l do as much work as today for tmr and feel thinner.

sunday morning rain is falling

rainy sunday. i like. =]

ytd was fun. went to town w jas after lunch. was suppose to meet her later. but had to save her from this baboon which escaped from e zoo. well anyway, after that we went ard looking for han's housewarming-bday-party gift. which was quite tough cos its suppose to b sth that can b a bday gift and housewarming gift. and also we'r on a budget shopping. but in e end we managed to find some quite decent and funky mugs. hee.

after that we reached han's place at 6. and its alr pretty crowded. almost all her relatives and friends r there alr. so we just hang out and help decorate e place w huiling von shaz and han. while alex and vivik (or is it vivic, not too sure) to start e fire at e bbq pit. then, went to pick serena isabelle and keewei up at e mrt w han. which took us like more than half an hr (tho e walk frm her house to e mrt is only like 10 mins). cos girls being girls have e privilege of being late (or so han claims). when we got back, my lil sis and her friend arrvived and huiling had to leave. i think han felt pretty bad abt it. in e end only von, shaz, lynn, jas, han, alex, kw, my lil sis, her friend and me stayed behind to bbq e food and eat. alex is really a true entertainer man. like non stop laughing w him ard. lol.
haven really played like that since.... last yr after promos? haa. ah well. its like a day stolen frm post-exams activities. haha~

okay. gtg for lunch. and gotta do chinese yu wen lian xi. =(

SCH'S OUT

ytd was graduation. frm ajc.

now, sch's out. and mugging in. i wonder how i'l do fo a's. i wonder wad i'l do next time. in uni, at work.

ohwell. 3weeks more to chinese. and 4 to e rest. sigh.

wish me luck! i need it desperately.

isjorgj

*yawns

im in this have alot of things to say but yet nth to say mood. :(
so contradicting.

ughh. my stress indicator's back - pimples.

yuck.

When I saw the break of day

I wished that I could fly away

Instead of kneeling in the sand

Catching teardrops in my hand

My heart is drenched in wine

But you'll be on my mind

Forever

Out across the endless sea

I would die in ecstacy

But I'll be a bag of bones

Driving down the road alone

My heart is drenched in wine

But you'll be on my mind

Forever

this is like an all time fav. haha. :)

some random thoughts

okay. drew this on paint. lol. so old-sch. ppl use like picture it! or photoshop while im stil stuck there. i rmb thats e first programme tt i learnt how to use when i first used e com. that was like at least a decade ago. ironically, its my mum who taught me how to use it. haa.

i have one whole stack of timed prac that i've done for e past 2 weeks to go thru and do e necessary revisions. hope i'l do better.

sigh.

i feel stupid today.

LOVELY.

i am totally in love. its suppose to b more purple than it looks here. e sequins r lovely. =]

heh. looking forward to christmas!

results.

hmmm. update of my results. CDEO. =(

oh well. i shld be sleeping now. but well. just feel like doing sth else other den work sleep eat today. sighh. i have this looong article i have to read tmr abt G8 for e timed prac tmr. =/ so sianifying. oh well.

my tennis lessons r starting next week. my mum was so supportive of it man. "wo bang ni da gei ta an pa." [i'l help u arrange e lessons for u.] my mum, being my mum, told me like 20mins later that eth's settled and can start next week. efficiency 101% man. oh. did i mention that my sis is learning w me too? i think not. but ya. she's learning too. =]

yawns. i shld get my beauty sleep. ciao.

i dun have tumor!!!

okay. i think im lazy. not doing any work and stuf. not much motivation. =/ this is baaaad. ah well. got bcoo for prelims so far. quite neutral abt it. think i've transcended to another level where i can find inner peace even w my not-so-great result. is it good or bad??

sighh. i miss my zennii. sigh. no music, no company. ="( hopefully can get it repaired by next week.

oh anyway, thanks to all those who listened to my lamentings abt my 'pimple-like growth', u know who ur. HEE. e doc said 'pimples can occur anywhere - from tip to toe' (occur??) and gave me some cream and antibiotics for it. lol. so i wldn die. yet. phew.

i still can relief teach at phs and find a waitressing job at a cool and hip restaurant/cafe after a's. oh i wanna sell stuff at flea market too! =)

yay.

alwight. gtg. ciao~

random thoughts

yawns. i realise tt i usually blog on sunday. haha. and i have to visit some ppl's blog to motivate myself into blogging. ohmy.

anyway, my mums V3 spoilt. she v upset bout it. kept saying tt she dun have e "fu fen" to enjoy new phones and stuff (cos tts lk e 1st time she bought herself a new phone). haiyo. why is she so negative?? =( ah well.

i guess no one's gonna visit my blog anytime soon. cos its all mouldy and rusty for too long. yawns. just finish my coffee. tasty. anyway to rizal and jas, theres nth formal and abnormal bout using e word TASTY okay!!

okay. i shld help my mum w her warranty registration n den get some work done. =[

ugh. prelims

having my usual morning coffee. dun usually have e luxury of slipping it slowly and enjoying its aroma. -yawns- quiet lazy sunday morning. nice.

but i think this is like e unnatural peace and tranquility before e real disaster comes - PRELIMS.

sobs. im really damn screwed for ALL my subjects. SIGHH. 1. i cant finish studying wad im suppose to. 2.even if i did theres no guarantee tt i'l do well.

so now wad???? =/ -sobs-

anyway im hooked on this song. have no idea why..

"What Am I To You?"

Norah Jones

What am I to you

Tell me darling true

To me you are the sea

Fast as you can be

And deep the shade of blue

When you're feeling low

To whom else do you go

See I cry if you hurt

I'd give you my last shirt

Because I love you so

If my sky should fall

Would you even call

Opened up my heart

I never want to part

I'm giving you the ball

When I look in your eyes

I can feel the butterflies

I love you when you're blue

Tell me darlin' true

What am I to you

Yeah well if my sky should fall

Would you even call

Opened up my heart

Never wanna part

I'm giving you the ball

When I look in your eyes

I can feel the butterflies

Could you find a love in me

Could you carve me in a tree

Don't fill my heart with lies

I will you love when you're blue

Tell me darlin' true

What am I to you

What am I to you

What am I to you

~

ugh. im stress.

abt 2 weeks to go. gp ppr on fri.

f*ck.

boo

yawns
im tired
i feel lk a total pig
ate alot for dinner
ohohoho! i got a new paul frank bag!!!
its so nice n cute!!!!
AAAAHHHHHHH~
okay. i've been gushing abt it since i got it.
heh. but its so nice!! =))

well check this out!
its so cute
okay
tired
nights
wil post a pic of my bag when i get my cam back
=)

lalala~

i feel lazy today haven done any work. think i'l do sth later. mayb some stats. since i scored 14% for my last timed prac. SIGH. im seriously gonna screw my prelims. I AM SO DEAD! :(

sighh. anyway. i think i might stayover at my big sis's house next week. hee. my bro in law is back in camp for re service. mayb i can go there n mug a bit. since my table is so darn messy and dusty. and no matter how hard i try to pack it its stil so messy and dusty. ARGH. im such a mess!

okay. i shld go off soon. gotta get sth done b4 work. ciao! =)

pensive

Business Times
Published October 11, 2003
Young, successful - and in search of a dream

By DANIEL BUENAS

UNHAPPY - that's how I feel as a young Singaporean.

I feel this way not because I'm jobless, poor or uneducated. In fact, I have a good job, a stable income and a good education. By most standards, I should be considered a successful young man.

However, I am slowly realising that the achievements I have been chasing are, perhaps, a chimera. I have sought and yearned for success, when perhaps what I should have been looking for was happiness, or meaning in life.

This is the dilemma that the youth in Singapore face - we cannot reconcile our apparent success with our gnawing dissatisfaction with life, and nobody can tell us why.

What we suffer from is a crisis of the soul.

Young Singaporeans are getting lost in a world in which our worth as human beings is tied to our material, social and physical successes.

However, as we look behind these successes, we often find the faded vestiges of what once were our dreams. Thus, our life's purpose has been drowned in the ocean of practicality.

This distinction between success and happiness was brought home to me recently after the death of a friend. He had passed on suddenly and in the prime of his life, and his death shook me from the stupor of endless days of work.

I realised that I had perhaps neglected my family and friends around me and,in so doing, had lost the true meaning of life.

It is too late now, but if I could speak to my friend one last time, I wouldn't say anything. Instead, I would listen to what he had to say.

Why?

Because Singaporeans are too busy rushing to work, rushing from work and rushing at work. We don't take the time to listen to others.

His death made me reflect on my own life, and the search for happiness.
Sadly, the need to find meaning in life wasn't one of the things I learnt at school. The need for success, however, was.

The desire for success is ingrained in our national psyche, and has been pursued with a fervour that equals - and often surpasses - religious zeal.

From young, we are streamed, labelled and forced into educational moulds, emerging as world-class products of our world-class education system. We graduate equipped to be successful in life.

Yet, I feel that in some way, we are lacking. I was never taught to pursue my dreams. Instead, I was taught to be practical. I chose my field of study, computer science, and my university based on practical considerations. I thought this would eventually lead to success. But success doesn't always translate into happiness.

Perhaps my idealism is brought about by a life that has not known the cruelty of war, or the bitter struggle for survival. Yet, I have met those who hold on to similar ideals, despite going through great suffering.

For instance, I recently interviewed a well-respected academic who spoke at length with me on the virtues of finding meaning and purpose in what we do.

He was no stranger to suffering, having lived through the Japanese occupation, the Communist revolution in China and nearly starving to death as a young boy. After so much hardship, one would expect him to extol the virtues of being practical.

Instead, he spoke of passion, desire, purpose and happiness in what we do.
I found it ironic that it took a senior citizen to point this out to what he called 'a handsome, energetic young man' (what I found even more ironic was his use of the word 'handsome').

Singaporean youth need to learn that our lives are not just about achieving success and that we cannot rely on the government or society to provide us with the reason for our existence. If we do, we will surely come away disillusioned and disappointed.

More than anything, Singaporean youth need to know that the beauty of life lies in fulfilling our own dreams - not someone else's - and that we should not fear pursuing them, whatever they may be. Therein lies our road to happiness.

As Eleanor Roosevelt so eloquently put it: 'The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams'.

The writer is a BT journalist. He is 24.


okay. i took this whole chunk from e ivle. well nice. i like this article. alot.it had expressed wad im feeling really accurately. ive been pondering abt my life. its hectic n piled up w revisions after revisions. i've friends who told me tt i'm doing v well. better prospectsin e future den em. somehow i wld really beg to differ. i think im lk a studying machine. trying v hard to memorise e tiniest bit of detail for bio chem math chinese wadeva - just to get a beautiful cert for my upcoming a's. to secure a place in a good uni, find a good course. and get a good job there after. i guess this is e best tt can happen to me after i've chosen e jc route. but somehow i really do wonder if this is wad i wan in my life. is this gonna lead me to find e meaning of my life. for a meaningless life is as good as being dead.

哀莫大于心死

well. i think tt means nth is more tragic den a cold and dead heart.

sighh. ="(
ohmy. i sound lk im old.

bleah`

hmmm. i've been home most of my time this weekend. have to cheong my gp hols assi. =\ but well im down to one more compre and 2 essays.

went shopping ytd. again. heh heh. got a a&f denim skirt, pullover, a hollister top and e checked shirt for my dad. heeheehee~ i think almost all my clothes r from there man. lol. and e salesgirl told me tt they restock on fridays. muahaha. mayb can go there every sat just to take a look. O_o

anyway, wil b going to sim lim sq to get a projector w my mum later. i think one day my house wil become some chinese language center.. not tt i disapprove of my mum's career. but think of e noise and crowd. esp on sat morning where u catch up w ur beauty sleep.....
hee wil b looking at watches later too. YAY`

ughh. back to work. i seriously think tt i screwed my midyrs. SIGHH.
hm. passed my chinese tho. 51% :]

a day at home doing wad u like to do

hee. just changed my blogskin. muahaha. i suddenly feel smarter. but e change took me awhile. actually didnt wanna change it til one zillion light years later. but well kinda fell in love w tt pic and im freeeee so ya, its changed. hee. got it from absolut vodka's website. its a really really cool site. heh.. found it in a virtual art gallery where absolut got artists to paint pics using absolut vodka as e theme. [hmm my sentence sounds funny] hee. nicenicenice.

oh well. im doing e things tt i like to do today. yay. this feeling is absolutely GREAT!

ok. i'm going back to wad i started in e morn. seeya ard!